Crows Nest Fest

The Crows Nest Fest 4/7/2009

What a splendid day it was. The sun was out and it was hot. The earlier passing rain did not dampen spirits at all. Having made my preparations and procured two three litre boxes of Organic 7.3% cider I headed the Viper-Cycle out onto the highway and meandered down to the site of the first Crows Nest Festival.

Crows Nest Fest Smoking Area

Crows Nest Fest Dining Area

The whole thing came about out of one of the bar regulars 60th birthday celebrations. Like Michael Evis, Steve has his own farm and land. He set up his barn for the bands and a large sizzling charcoal grill to cook up the steaks, burgers, and such to one side. A bar was set up in the barn. The scene was set.

Crows Nest Fest Kitchen Manned By Pub Landlord Daz And Pub Regular Macca

I arrived just as a mini van taxi stuffed with other bar regulars arrived. Macca and Daz were cooking up a storm. The taxi spilled out and those arriving were surprised I’d ridden down to the gig on the push bike. They all had a giggle over it as I've been wowing them the last couple of weeks with my recent cycle rides recovering my health and strength after my quadruple heart by-pass.

Crows Nest Fest

I got talking to Sean, Paul, Simion, Edgey, Jane, Sarah and others while I ate my pork chops and opened up the cider. A shout went out,

“Anyone seen John Mathias ?”

The One And Only John Mathias With Radio, Crows Nest Fest

John's steak was ready. Everyone was in good spirits, and Steve the DJ got the sound box happening.

Andy & Sophie, Crows Nest Fest

Before long Gus Travis took the stage in the barn knocking out Elvis numbers and other Rock ‘N’ Roll classics. Andy and Sophie, wearing her ‘My Dad Is The Mayor’ T-shirt proudly, were enjoying themselves. The Mayor himself made an early exit. Gus went down pretty well and was a good warm up act for the headline act, The Gypsies. At the end of the set Johnny Jones joined Gus on stage and took over as compare.

Sarah, Crows Nest Fest

Sarah & Kylie, Crows Nest Fest

I ran into Kylie and April, and their big box of beer and wine. We settled in comfy close to the stage on the well placed hay stacks to watch The Gypsies first set. They were good too, doing a good spread of cover versions that pleased the crowd. There was an interval while the band had something to eat and grabbed a couple of beers. Soon they were on stage again putting on a very good show and accompanied by Sarah and others dancing on stage with the band. Stevie himself wearing my leather jacket.

Stevie On Stage With The Gypsies Wearing Viper's Internationally Recognisable Leather, Crows Nest Fest

Stevie On Stage With The Gypsies Wearing Viper's Internationally Recognisable Leather, Crows Nest Fest

Camera Man, Sue, Stevie, April & Kylie (Sitting), Crows Nest Fest

Stevie & Sarah On Stage With The Gypsies, Crows Nest Fest

Pub Landlady (Centre), Crows Nest Fest

Time, and my cider, swiftly passed.

Pub Regulars Dean & Zara, Crows Nest Fest

Somewhere after midnight with bands and the cider all finished the wind down began. Many folks started to drift off homewards. Now some of you can see what’s coming next, some of you reading no doubt already know all about it. You see at that point it seemed like a good idea to return home in the style I’d arrived. Under my own steam. That’s right, I tried to cycle home. It seemed perfectly reasonable at the time. It’s here that strangely my memory breaks down some. What follows is what I pieced together, and what was told to me in the pub next day.

I woke up Sunday morning with bloodied hands, bruises on my knees and elbows, and a busted rib. My head didn’t hurt, but I was a bit spaced out. What the fuck had gone on here ? I showered and cooked myself some bacon, egg, sausage, and beans with a nice pot of tea. I couldn’t figure it out. I knew I hadn’t had a battle at the gig. Even went out of my way to avoid one at one point so as not to spoil the fun for everybody. I knew I hadn’t had a battle on the way home either because broken fragments had begun to come back to me. There was something about getting out of a Range Rover with a couple of lads that had picked me and the bike up somewhere. Also, some memory of riding along the pavement and a few memories of falling off pretty much as soon as I got on the thing.

Down at the pub Roy and Norma were already in their accustomed positions at the bar. They had been to the gig too but had left early and returned to the pub. Then young Andy arrived,

“The state of you last night.”

“What ?”

Barmaid Anna, Roy and Norma raised their eyebrows.

“Do you remember seeing me last night ?”

“Where ?”

“Pulling you out the hedge. You were upside down in the hedge with the bike on top of you and your leg through it, just like you were riding it, but upside down. You were stuck under the fence as well.”

The both sides of the bar cracked up laughing. Apparently I’d fallen off at least half a dozen times in just a couple of hundred yards. Somebody who was a stranger was trying to talk me into letting him bring the bike back to me in the morning. I was having none of it, sure I was about to be robbed. It seems just a little later, Edgey took the bike off me and stuck it in a hedge in an attempt to prevent me further from falling off again.

He failed. It seems I recovered the bike undaunted, and with a fixed expression of a man on a mission and a thourgh disregard for my own personal safety just eight months on from quadruple heart by-pass, proceeded to fall off it a few more times before conceding temporary defeat, and walking down a stretch with it.

At some point I must have mastered it because I remember riding along a stretch of pavement, before falling off again after a slight touch of a hedge. I made it to the roundabout before Stevie’s son found me. It seems he was sent looking after somebody put through a call to say ‘one of the party guests is swerving all over the road and will likely kill himself’. They tell me I got a bit shirty with the friend of Stevie’s son who it must have seemed to me at the time was some other cunt intent on robbing the bike. Between them they must have convinced me otherwise because it was them who brought me safely home.

They were right of course. I should have come back for the bike the day after. I could have easily been hit by a car, and I could have hurt myself more seriously than I had. Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time, and I didn’t have a wife to convince me otherwise. Besides, you can’t kill the undead.

My apologies to all those I worried. I think next year I’ll maybe just get a taxi. Thank you Steve and Nettie. You certainly know how to throw a party.

Viper 12/7/2009

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First Published 13/7/2009 by Viperslair.co.uk

Any un-authorized publication of texts, parts of texts, or images, will result in legal action. Publishing permission in writing, on paper, can be obtained from the Viperslair.co.uk Editor.

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